We all want to make people laugh – it’s an incredibly desirable trait to have. And the fact that it’s one of the top qualities women look for in a man makes it all the more important.
Have you ever been on a good date and not found yourself laughing? That’s because there’s no such thing as a good date without laughter. It makes dates more fun, takes the pressure off, and kills awkward silences.
Being able to make a woman laugh will not only help you to secure a second and third date, but it’ll also boost your confidence which will definitely have something to do with date number four.
Some men are natural-born comedians, they’re hilarious without even meaning to be. Even though you might envy them, you can’t help but laugh either, they’re that funny. But just because you’re not ready to jump into stand-up comedy, doesn’t mean you can’t learn how to be funny, or funnier if you’re not starting from scratch.
We speak to the experts to find out 10 proven ways to make a woman laugh, but don’t just take our word for it.
1. Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously
“One of the first steps to making a woman laugh is to not take yourself too seriously. It sends a powerful signal – it shows that you are comfortable in your own skin which is a highly attractive trait,” says Jessica Alderson, Co-Founder at So Syncd. So why does this matter?
Women are much more likely to laugh when they are with someone who appears confident because they feel more at ease themselves. If you feel relaxed, she’ll pick up on this and mirror your behavior. Once she’s relaxed, getting her to laugh will be effortless. Or at least a lot easier.
2. Work Out Your Style of Humor
“Figuring out what style of humor suits you best will set you on the right path to making her laugh. Perhaps you’re the kind of man who can deliver a perfectly timed deadpan joke. Or you might be a master of wordplay,” says Alderson.
When it comes to types of humor, there is no one-size-fits-all, and working out which style is best suited to you will increase your chance of making her laugh. Discover your strengths and use them.
3. Accept That You Might Not Get It Right the First Time
This doesn’t mean accepting defeat, it just means making a woman laugh will involve trial and error. No two women are the same.
You might not be able to make her laugh the first time you try but don’t freak out. Alderson says, “It’s normal. Not everyone has the same sense of humor and it can be hard to know what she likes at first, especially if you don’t know each other well.”
A joke that makes one woman cry with laughter might fall flat with another. She assures us that making a woman laugh is a learning experience and the sooner you try, the faster you’ll discover what puts a smile on her face.
4. Find a Woman Who Appreciates Your Humor
It’s a simple fact that not everyone will find you funny (sorry). The sooner you accept this, the better. “Even the highest-paid comedians in the world have people who just don’t get their jokes. If you’re trying your best to make her laugh but it’s just not happening, it might be a sign that you’re fundamentally incompatible,” says Alderson.
It’s important not to force it – laughs, relationships, anything. But don’t take it personally. The next woman you date might be unable to contain her laughter the moment you open your mouth.
5. Be Authentically Quirky
We know what you’re thinking: quirky? Isn’t that another way to say turn off? If you’re extremely boring, yes. Quirks make things fun, and when things are fun, you can expect laughter. “We all have a naturally charming, quirky gene somewhere inside.
The more you are authentically yourself, the more your naturally endearing quirky side will shine through,” says Dr. Carla Marie Manly, Clinical Psychologist, Speaker, and Author of Date Smart. She encourages us to forget about staging being funny and allowing your genuine humor to reflect who you are.
A woman wants to know who you really are, including your natural sense of humor. She needs to know that you’re going to make her laugh. Because trust us when we say if you can’t make her laugh, there’s not much else you’re going to get her to do.
She deserves to know the real you, and you deserve to be with someone who likes you for who that is. Authentic personal charm upstages rehearsed humor every time guaranteed.
6. Share Funny Stories About Your Past
Without being self-deprecating, tell stores about your past that reflect your funny stumbles and imperfections. But nothing too deep or too embarrassing, you want her to laugh with you, not at you. And whether you’re naturally funny or not, we all have childhood stories that spark a laugh every time we think about them.
When we add a dose of humor to the escapades from the past, we’re sharing a bit of personal history while also bringing laughter to the table. “Humorous story-telling is a great way to bring a level of intimacy to a conversation without getting too deep,” says Dr. Manly.
“And, if it’s your style, hyperbolic twists can be absolutely hilarious; stories that are a blend of the ridiculous and reality can keep a date guessing – and laughing for hours.” Once you start to share funny stories about your past, you can bet she’ll begin to as well so you won’t feel embarrassed alone. Hopefully.
7. Watch a Rom-Com Together
“Whether you share the fun of watching What Women Want or a classic like When Harry Met Sally, watching a rom-com with a date is a sure-fire way to break the ice and create common ground,” says Dr. Manly. Not only do you laugh together as you watch the movie, but you’ll continue to laugh as you chat about the film afterward.
The inside jokes that rom-coms spark create a bonded, unifying humor that often spills over into future conversations. Plus as an added bonus, if you’re not naturally very funny, rom-coms completely take the pressure off of you. All you have to do is pick a good one and make sure it’s funny, of course. Your female friends are guaranteed to have a go-to list on hand.
8. Pay Attention To the Details
When you have a great memory for detail and can bring things up later, you can create inside jokes that only the two of you will understand. “This is a great way to make her laugh and create a bond between the two of you,” says Amber Artis, CEO, and Co-Founder at Select Date Society.
“For example, if you both notice a guy dressed in a bright pink outfit while you’re having dinner at Perch and then you see a woman wearing the same color a week later, you can turn to your date and say, ‘Did she borrow that outfit from the guy at the Perch?’ It will create a connection between the two of you that no one else around you will understand.”
So take in your surroundings, but not too much or she’ll think you’re more interested in what’s going on around you than her and there’s nothing funny about her doing a runner.
9. Use Witty Banter To Tease Her and Make Fun of Yourself
The key to this is not going too far – there’s a fine line between witty banter and just being plain old mean. “You don’t want to cross the line from teasing her to being mean and you don’t want to be so self-decrepitating that it becomes weird,” says Artis.
An effective way to do this is to give her a compliment by saying something like, “You don’t look hot at all” with a smile when she is clearly glammed up and looking gorgeous. You could also look at your own outfit and say, “I think I’m over-dressed” when she is outshining you, recommends Artis.
10. Practice Being Funny
Like everything in life, practice makes perfect. “You can watch comedy shows, read jokes, and pay attention to the world around you to grow your appreciation for humor,” says Artis. Once you’ve learned some of the tricks of the trade, start practicing with friends and family (preferably female).
Tell funny stories and jokes and see how other people react. While not everyone has the same sense of humor, if you’ve got the majority vote, you’re in with a pretty good chance of making her laugh. “Refine your craft before trying out your comedy skills on her!” she says.